Saying No Is Not a Dangerous Factor
Each issues will be true is considered one of Kennedy’s most oft-repeated phrases. As in, I’ve an excellent child and they’re hitting or, as she put it, “I am allowed to say no. And my child is allowed to be upset about it. Being upset doesn’t suggest I’ve to vary my thoughts. However me saying no doesn’t suggest my child has to placed on a smile.”
This most frequently will get put into follow while you’re, say, at a toy retailer choosing up one thing for a celebration and your youngsters spies one thing they desperately want. Admittedly, mentioned Kennedy, there are various cases when she’ll simply purchase the rattling bouncy ball. But when she has the time and house to embrace the meltdown, she views it as a studying alternative.
“I might really say, ‘I hear you. Two issues are true: As a dad or mum, my job is to make choices that I believe are good for you. And as a child, your job is to permit your self to have emotions about it. I am allowed to make choices, you are allowed to be upset, and we’re gonna transfer on from there,'” she outlined of her go-to script. “What you are doing there’s you are validating your proper to carry a boundary, whilst you’re additionally validating your child’s proper to have a response. Often, once we wrestle, we’re solely in a position to do a type of as a result of we are saying, ‘I am the dad or mum, I get to make thje choice!’ Or we are saying, ‘Positive!’, after which we alter our choice to make our children completely satisfied.”