Returning to school or kindergarten can cause stress in a child. Psychologists, however, convince that with the help of parents and guardians, the end of the holidays does not have to be a painful experience. What is worth remembering before the first bell rings? How to talk to a child?
A new school year will begin on Monday. According to experts, the first day of kindergarten or the first school bell do not have to trigger negative emotions in children.
Just like adults, children need time
As emphasized by Dr. Karolina Appelt from Adam Mickiewicz University in Poznań, it is first and foremost worth realizing that returning to school can be a challenge for children. – This is a normal thing. Just as we, adults, need time to get back into the rhythm of work after returning from vacation, it may be necessary for children as well. Especially since their vacations are much longer than ours – emphasizes the psychologist.
A conversation during which the parent recalls their own difficult childhood memories can be helpful. This will allow the child to understand that they are not alone with their fears, that their mother or father experienced similar emotions.
Back to School. Tasks for Parents
The importance of conversation is also emphasized by Małgorzata Turczyk from the Jagiellonian University in Krakow. As she points out, the task of adults is to try to accustom the child to a new situation as much as possible. – Talk as much as possible about school or kindergarten, so that the child has the opportunity to build a relatively rational image of the institution they are going to in their head. So that the space in which the child will be staying is safe for them – she emphasizes.
– It often seems to us, adults, that if we don't talk about certain things, they won't exist in the reality of children. What we don't talk about with children grows in them anyway. So it's not worth idealizing. We often talk about school or kindergarten as a land of happiness, joy or eternal fun. And kindergarten is not that land, although sometimes it is. The fact that we, the parents, won't be there, that we'll have to share toys, all of this is new and difficult for a child – says Turczyk.
The 2024/2025 school year will start on September 2Shutterstock
First of all, don't scare
It is important not to overdo it and focus on building a positive attitude during conversations with the child, not to scare. – Children are very permeated with emotions and attitudes flowing from the environment, their attitude is built. It is worth controlling this and trying to show children the advantages of going to school – explains the expert.
And what if a child starting school feels anxious? – Let's not trivialize their fears, let's try to talk. Let's ask what's going on, what the fears are about. Schools often organize integration classes that allow the child to get to know the space in which they will be staying. It's worth taking advantage of this. If not, parents themselves can take the initiative to familiarize the child with, for example, the space around the school, the playground or the sports field – notes Karolina Appelt.
He also points out that in the age of social media, parents can take care of the joint integration of the youngest even before the school year begins. After a meeting arranged at home, children will have time to miss each other even before September 2. As a result, school will be associated with them not only with learning and gaining knowledge, but also with time for joint fun and entertainment.
As Appelt emphasizes, it is also important to accustom a child to a specific daily rhythm. – I know families who have a routine during the holidays: the time of getting up, meals, other activities during the day are fixed. But in many homes, the holiday period is a time of greater freedom. It is very important to take care of the children's adjustment during these last days and weeks, so that their bodies do not experience shock at the beginning of September – she says.
When is it worth asking for psychological and pedagogical help?
– Let's remember that fears and concerns are natural and normal. This time of adaptation is necessary. Therefore, it is important to be patient with your children, to accompany them in this difficult time for them. There are children in whom this fear will be highly developed. Let's not be afraid to ask for professional psychological and pedagogical help in such a situation – Appelt sums up.
Małgorzata Turczyk points out that a common mistake is to give in to a child and allow them not to go to school when they don't want to. – If a child is convinced that some of their behavior or symptoms will cause them to miss school several times, we can be sure that they will get used to it and will try to do so at the next opportunity – she adds.
Calendar of the school year 2024/2025PAP
Main image source: Shutterstock