During their pregnancy, they learned of a diagnosis that sounded like a death sentence and did not concern their health – only the lives of their children. Despite this, they decided to give birth. Mrs. Anna, Kamila and Patrycja told about their experiences and what was the worst for them.
Mrs. Anna Chrząścik, while pregnant, found out that her beloved and long-awaited son had a serious heart defect. Michał lived for four and a half months. – Within 20 minutes his condition worsened and Michał died in our arms, completely unexpectedly for us – the woman confesses.
Mrs. Kamila Lewandowska-Nowak also found out during her pregnancy that her son had a serious defect. However, she did not decide to have an abortion, she wanted to give birth to the child. Mrs. Kamila's son was born dead at 33 weeks. – The midwife came to me with my son wrapped in a blanket and handed him to me like a healthy child. She told me how much he weighed, how long he was and left us alone – says Mrs. Kamila.
READ ALSO: Edwards Syndrome, Acrania, Holoprosencephaly. What are Lethal Defects?
The child of Mrs. Patrycja Płoszaj, also with a serious defect, lived for three days. There are photos from that time. The mother wanted to give birth to her daughter. The most difficult moment turned out to be not the moment of the child's expected death, but the way in which the hospital staff decided to take the body of the newborn from the mother. “I looked, they were coming with this stretch, tape, and that I should wrap her in this, but I couldn't wrap her in this and I asked the nurse if she could do it for me. I didn't even look at it, but the tape was constantly pounding in my head,” the woman recalls.
The term “pregnancy registry” appeared during the PiS government. Although the government changed, concerns remainedAdrianna Otręba/Fakty TVN
They faced the most difficult decision of their lives.
Women who want to give birth to a child despite being diagnosed with genetic defects are not uncommon. However, they encounter great difficulties in being able to implement their decision. The lack of standards for a dignified burial is just one of the problems. There is also a lack of information on where a woman can get psychological help.
There are 16 perinatal hospices in Poland, which help to say goodbye to a newborn. – I didn't even know that perinatal hospices existed, because it's not talked about – admits Mrs. Marta Gryga, Zuzanna's mother.
Women choose to give birth to a child with a so-called lethal defect for many reasons: they want to experience birth, they want to touch the child, be able to hug it and say goodbye. – When deciding to have a child, we are not able to choose whether it will have black or blond hair and we are not able to choose whether it will be a healthy or sick child, but it is ours – says Ms. Patrycja Płoszaj. – Children come with gifts – if we allow ourselves to meet them, we will find out what kind. At least this message emerged from the stories we have encountered – adds Ms. Alina Wojsław. – For women, this is a difficult decision and I believe that women should not be judged by the decision they make, because every decision is difficult and each leaves a mark – believes Ms. Marta Gryga.
Main image source: TVN Facts